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The Three A’s Of Improving Your Confidence

Confidence is something that a lot of people feel is difficult to grasp. I can say I personally had a hard time being confident, myself. I was also raised to be the timid one and I was never the type to want to be the center of attention – although I secretly envied the people who could stand up in class and be able to speak proudly of their class presentation. It wasn’t something I could easily build up, so I never had it as a young age. It can be easy to assume that it is something that you either have or don’t have. However, this is not how it is. The fact is, confidence is more like a skill which you can learn to develop as much as you want. A lot of people with low self-esteem assume that it is not something they have access to. But the good news is that there are some simple shortcuts towards improving your confidence. Anyone can do this, and you can start right away. If you follow the basics of the following three things, you will find your confidence improving dramatically in no time at all. Let’s have a look at what those three are, and how to make them work for you.

Appearance

There is no doubt that appearance has a significant influence on your confidence levels. By appearance, I don’t mean that you should be trying to look a certain way. But coming from a traditional culture where curvy is looked at as ugly and being pale and skinny is looked at as beautiful, I could never please the appearance of what my culture defines as attractive. That is not the way to feel more confident about yourself. True confidence comes from doing whatever is necessary to look the way you want to. It is not about looking the way that other people or society wants you to. Taking care of your appearance is mostly a matter of staying on top of certain routines. It helps to have the right products for all the things that you want to achieve with your look. If you are hoping to remove hair regularly for example, then it might be worth investing in sugar wax products. It is all about what you want to achieve with your own body. When how you look is in alignment with how you feel about yourself, you will feel much better about yourself.

Attitude

But it is not all about appearance. There is also much to be said for the simple act of adopting the right attitude. Your attitude determines how you feel about yourself in a big way. It is sometimes surprising what an effect it can truly have on your self-esteem. Like I mentioned before, I was never the type to go after what I would want. I was always the one to observe in the background. The problem a lot of people have here is that they don’t know how you can actually improve your attitude towards everyday life. The truth is, it is just a matter of practice. When I hit my legal age, I started to observe how people reacted in night life, how women in movies went after what they wanted, how easy and difficult it was to be a women in a so-called man’s world — so I created an alter ego. My alter ego was my way to help free my timid state and just learn to let go. Overtime, the more I used my alter ego, the more that persona became a part of who I am now. If you feel yourself starting to feel low about yourself, then you should try to examine that feeling and understand it. By understanding it, you can then work to change it.

Awareness

Adopting the right attitude can take a lot of practice to get right. To be able to do it, you need to also develop your ability to be self-aware. It is difficult to make any real changes to yourself without developing some awareness. This in itself is a deceptively simple act. All you need to do is make sure that you are being mindful of what is going through your mind at all times. At first, this might seem a little tricky. With practice, however, it will become easier. And as it becomes easier, you will find that you have more power to change who you are.

I do believe you’re always going to be molding yourself into the person you want to be – it will take some time and some trial and error, but eventually it’ll all come to place. If I knew I could be who I am now 15 years ago, my life would’ve been so different. But instead I had to go through the turbulence, the self-awareness and the trials of life to know what I know now.

 

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4 Comments

  • Reply Candy

    Self awareness is so hard! I wish I could see this more clearly. It’s definitely getting better as I age, but still a hard one 🙂

    October 24, 2016 at 9:23 PM
  • Reply Ree love30

    Oh wow you have hit the nail on the head! I was like you too when i was young ” was also raised to be the timid one and I was never the type to want to be the center of attention” . But with the right people around me in my Late teens and early 20s, I had the support to build self awareness and attitude! I’ve now never been as confident now I’m in my 30s and I’m loving it! Ree Love30

    October 25, 2016 at 7:50 AM
  • Reply Style & Life by Susana

    Loving this post! You have touched on such a great topic. I know as a child I suffered from extreme shyness and as I got older, I started to get a little more open and confident. Although an abusive ex would always demoralise me constantly would make me go backwards, I found it hard to be accepting of myself and had a negative attitude about myself because of my horrible experience with him. But now I’m a lot better but still can revert back but not as bad. This is such an important post and so wonderful you wrote about it. Thank you for sharing xx

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    October 25, 2016 at 7:00 PM
  • Reply nycgingeronthego

    I’ve worked so much on self confidence lately. I’m happier with myself at 30 than I’ve ever been!

    October 26, 2016 at 12:23 PM
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