So you’re not a size 0, now what?
Over time and time again, the media has depicted the term ‘beauty’ in that if you don’t fit the ideals of what is considered thin then you’re not considered attractive. I want to start off by stating that I don’t put myself on a strict diet and I love food – as most of us do – but I do watch what I eat and it took me a long time to just simply accept the body that I have. Yes, there are times where I am still self-conscious but I try real hard not to bring me down nor allow myself not to find my sense of style. We’re only human right?
Growing up in a traditional Filipino household, rice is something we all ate almost religiously. I also grew up where fat-shaming is considered normal to our culture. Although Filipinos are often known to be the nicest people on earth, sometimes their words can cut deeper than knives. When I was a child, I went to the Philippines with my grandmother in hopes that I would do my education there – however, a year or so later I fell sick and flew back to Canada. While I was there, I quickly learned the language but resented my time there due to my illness.
Over time, I started to gain weight, found my own sense of style and of course, hit puberty. After I graduated from high school my family made a point to visit the Philippines every 5 years or so. If it wasn’t already bad enough dealing with high school and its judgemental teens, it doesn’t get any better going back to the motherland. Don’t get me wrong, the Philippines is gorgeous, however, if you have some meat on your bones your cousins, aunts, and uncles will definitely make a point out of it. By this time, I can’t speak the language anymore but I still understood Filipino. Even if I lost my ability to understand, the judgemental stare is a universal language we all know.
Mind you, out of respect I wore appropriate attire where my assets weren’t popping out but the constant “ahh, she’s so big now.”, “You shouldn’t eat so much.” and “You’re even bigger than your mom.” statements still came in. One time, I was excited to go shopping and wanted to buy a new bra. When I asked for my size, it was as if I was asking for a unicorn. So you can only imagine the embarrassment I felt as I walked out and lost my excitement to shop.
I eventually got over it.
Years passed and I started to build a tougher skin, started to evolve in my own sense of style and when I went back to the Philippines again, I just decided to dismiss the criticisms and walk away. I’m not going to lie and say it’s easy because it still affects me when I hear it – it just doesn’t demotivate me or love myself less. When my uncle visits, he doesn’t stop himself when he calls me a hippo or asks J why he chose to be with me when I’m fat. (For the record, J answered saying, No I’m not fat, I’m pretty. *brownie points*) I just choose to walk away. I have chosen to walk away from anything that brings negativity, especially towards my body. I’ve worked so hard to finally accept my own sense of beauty that I don’t want to surround myself around people’s criticisms about my body.
This isn’t a pity post
but rather, empowering anyone who feels less beautiful because of society’s ideals of what is defined “attractive”. I’m not a size 0 nor do I shop for plus sizes but I do sometimes shop for bigger clothing to ensure it fits me properly. Just because I have curves doesn’t necessarily mean it’s easy for me to find the perfect size nor do some clothes make me look flattering. I struggle to find the perfect pair of jeans without showing too much of my muffin top or a nice bra without a tit falling out. I don’t have a thigh gap and I don’t have a flat stomach but I still find ways to embrace fashion with my own personal touch to it. I’m not here to say I’m this big fashion blogger or idol, but I created my own sense of style from simply learning the ability to love my body. If I can overcome all the negativity on a daily basis and still be able to put on the flattering outfit — I believe anyone can.
We may not be able to change how culture or tradition came to be when it comes to body-shaming but we can change how we perceive beauty and treat people regardless of their size. You don’t have to be thin or have curves to have style, you just need to be confident in who you are. Fashion is art and if you make your body your canvas, the options are limitless.
You just need to come out of your shell and start somewhere.
To help empower you, I wanted to gift one lucky reader their own outfit. Style comes from within you, so I’m giving away:
- $75 gift-card from Pink Blush
- A Free pair of Bearpaw Shoes
All you have to do is:
- Follow ME on Instagram
- Like this Instagram Post
- Follow Pink Blush on Instagram
- Follow Bearpaw on Instagram
For additional entries:
- Tag your friends on the Instagram post here
- Comment below on what you love about your body + your Instagram handle
This giveaway will run from 05/22/2017 – 05/25/2017 and the random winner will be announced within 24 hours via Instagram DM! This giveaway is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram. Must be 18 years or older to enter. Open to entrants within the U.S. or have a valid U.S. shipping address. Those who have won a Pink Blush or Bear Paw giveaway within the last 6 months will not be eligible to win.